If you have never seen Lil' Bush on the Comedy Channel, you should.  Even if you are diehard conservative/libertarian (like myself) who things that, despite many mistakes, on the whole GWB has been a fair president.

But be warned:  you will be offended.  It is a sarcastic, disrespectful, irreverent show.  And lefties -- including Lil' Al, Lil' Nancy, Lil' Obama, etc are not spared its caustic humor.

Essentially, imagine South Park, but the leading characters are Lil' W, Lil' Condi, Lil' Rumsfeld, and Lil' Cheney.

My FAVORITE character, though, is Lil' Cheney.  His father, of course, is Darth Vader.  Lil' Cheney talks with the same quiet mumble you hear from the real one.  Although, the mumble is more pronounce and more cruel.  In fact, I watch the show solely to watch Lil' Cheney.  Any time he speaks, I am on the floor in stitches.

Of course, I am a HUGE Dick Cheney fan.  He is a man of few words, and lots of meaning.  And I think he was absolutely at his best when he told that walking human turd Pat Leahy to go frak himself.

Well, at least when it comes to nuclear power.  France generates 80% of their electricity through nuclear power.  We generate less than 20%.  Yet, we have the most nuclearized Navy in the world. The USS Ronald Reagan (CVN-76), the latest Nimitz-class Supercarrier to join the fleet, boasts 2 Westinghouse nuclear reactors.  That is the same number currently in service at Calvert Cliffs.

We have to give Indiana University's Department of Psychological and Brain Sciences an award for stating the obvious:

More often than not, guys interpret even friendly cues, such as a subtle smile from a gal, as a sexual come-on, and a new study discovers why: Guys are clueless.

That's according to a story on LiveScience.com.

Next up, the Indiana University Department of Earth Sciences will announce that the sun will rise in the east tomorrow morning.

The question is-- with Universities both public and private sloughing at the public trough -- who pays for this?  Are these types of studies what causes college educations by outpace inflation by almost 1000%?  Is the expenditure of money on these things the reasons why colleges push more for and more student loan availability and bigger Pell grants?

Anyone wonder I have so little regard for a modern college education?

Will small wonders never cease!  This afternoon, some trucker trying to run the Weight Station on I-83 between MD 439 and MD 45 got snagged by a Baltimore County Police Cruiser right in front of my house.  This is a personal pet peeve, since the Cockeysville Precinct doesn't  have the manpower to enforce the laws -- and the State Police just don't care.

It should be noted that at least a dozen trucks -- everything from auto carriers to container bobtails (and thus not "farm loads") run that weigh state every single day.

Here's a shot:

Since this stretch of York Road is well known for speeding -- its a clear 2 mile, wide open strech the kids love to drag race on -- I have offered my driveway and coffee maker a number of times, all to no avail.  It's good to see the Baltimore County Police out and enforcing traffic law.

As I have said before, the roads would be much safer in Maryland if the existing laws were only enforced.  Trucks trying to run the Weigh Station are either poorly maintained, overweight, or the drivers are over hours.  Enforce the law, and make the roads safer.

Once all the cheering from the defeat of the Crooked Oak Lane project dies down, Gary Mackes should start collecting boxes.  He is no doubt a dead man walking.

"Dumbass".  It is word that should resound with Congressman, as they fit the definition perfectly.  As Michelle Malkin notes, federal prosecutors now know that a trip to Iraq before the run-up to the invasion was paid for-- lock, stock, and barrel -- by Saddam Hussein.

Federal prosecutors say Saddam Hussein’s intelligence agency secretly financed a trip to Iraq for three U.S. lawmakers during the run-up to the U.S.-led invasion.

The Congressman were "Baghdad Jim" McDermott, David Bonior, and Mike Thompson.

The trip, of course, was funded through an intermediary named Muthanna Al-Hanooti, who was paid with oil for his troubles.  That's right.  Oil from Iraq, which at the time was under some pretty damn stringent international sanctions.  Its good to know that they were working.

Prosecutors claim that the Congressmen did not know the trip was paid for by Saddam. 

Yeah, and there really is a leprechaun guarding a pot of gold at the end of that rainbow.

Lawless teachers unions are at it again, trying to stifle anything resembling competition in education:

According to a report by Tallahassee’s News Channel 7, the Florida Education Association may sue to shut down that state’s scholarship tax credit program. Under this program, businesses can donate to non-profit scholarship funds that subsidize tuition for low-income kids at the private schools of their families’ choosing. In return, the businesses can claim dollar for dollar tax credits up to a certain limit.

Yes, you read that right.  No state money is being taken away from public schools.  This is all private money being donated to private non-profit foundations for scholarships up to a maximum value of $3,750 (about $4,000 less than is spent per pupil in Florida schools).  And those foundations are required to put all money they receive under the program toward scholarships, and can only carry over 25% of received monies from year to year.

So what is the issue?  The lawless teachers unions are worried that the more students that take advantage of the scholarships, the less students there will be public education.  THEY DON'T WANT TO LOSE THEIR "CUSTOMERS".

So much for freedom.

See the whole article at Cato @ Liberty.

According to the Washington Post, Maryland's Illegal Immigrant community is suddenly feeling the heat and is claiming Maryland is becoming "less friendly".

Victory does come in the small steps and not the large leaps.

In my opinion, there are few politicians who have turned out to be more miserable failures than Albert Gore.  And to that, I would add "complete frakking hypocrite".

It turns out that Al Gore-- that paragon of citizen journalism who helped start up current.tv -- has banned any recording devices OR journalists from his keynote at the RSA Conference.

As if that will stop the attendees from being faithful "citizen journalists" and reporting the complete balderdash he has to say.

According to Fox News, John McCain said the following in a speech today:

In this struggle, scholarships will be far more important than smart bombs.

Someone please tell him to shut his frakking mouth, because with comments like that, he will lose an election that Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton are trying to hand him on a silver platter.

The Maryland Senate, who takes no pain in soddomizing the citizenry of Maryland on a daily basis, continues to throw us all under the bus when it comes to energy policy.  Today, they gave us the glorious right of being informed when utilitiy companies up and decide to add a surcharge to our bills to pay for "energy efficiency programs".

I have a question:  whatever happened to contract law in this state?  With an entire chamber all but filled with whoring, ambulance chasing attorneys, you would think that tort and contract law would be something they might be concerned about.

Apparently, no.  Because the Maryland Senate is not smarter than a 5th grader.  Or a five year old.

Do you vote for the Nut with Two Boobs, or the Boob with Two Nuts?

Inquiring minds want to know.

The Supreme Court has issued its ruling in Medellin v Texas, and that ruling -- a 6-3 decision -- is a slam dunk victory for our nation, our Constitution, and all of us as citizens.

The Supreme Court has essentially ruled that international treaties cannot be used to rewrite state law unless Congress has acted proactively to enact Federal statutes to that effect.

This case should be viewed as hallmark victory for those of us who reject the imposition of foreign law and jurisprudence on citizens who neither voted for those laws nor for lawmakers to vote for those laws.

Hillary Clinton is now trying to claim "mea culpa" on the entire Tuzla/Landing up sniper fire nonsense.

It seems like she actually has learned something from her experience as First Lady:  it's better to apologize fast than lie long.

But is such a shoddy memory a good quality in a Presidential Candidate?

Is the US Senate smarter than a 5th grader?

The Lieberman-Warner Climate Security Act of 2008 will cost each American household over $1,500 per year and add fifty-three cents to the cost of a gallon of gasoline, according to a recently released analysis by the Environmental Protection Agency.

So answer me this:  If the US Congress thinks that a stupid $600 rebate will keep us out of a recession, then what will $1,500 per year per household in new costs do?

Is the US Senate smarter than a 5th grader? 

I don't think so.

There are facists in our midst.  Politicians who impose a police state here in Maryland.  It's clear to me that civil rights no longer matter to the General Politburo in Soddom on the Severn.

The roll call for the Senate vote on the Maryland DNA bill is in, and I have broken them into "Sons of Liberty" and "Ratfrakking Facists".

The Obamas have release their tax returns for 2000-2006.  One thing is for sure:  "common folk" they are not.  And if they cannot afford summer camp, piano lessons and dancing lessons for their kids on that adjusted gross income, well, I certainly don't want Barack trying to run the Federal Government.

More here.

Even CBS -- the great Sauronic Eye -- has uncovered the hoax that is Hillary Clinton's claim that she landed under sniper fire:

My favorite part:  the claim by campaign officials that she was referring to weapons fire in the hills around the landing area.  By that definition, every time she boarded or exited a Marine Special Missions Flight on the White House Lawn, she was under sniper fire.

Of course, if she was really "landing under fire", don't you think the military would have taken the precaution of at least giving Hillary and Chelsea some basic body armor?  Better yet, do you really think the Secret Service would have let her parade around in such an insecure area?  After all, getting the First Lady killed is not really a good career advancement plan.

Another day, another data breach.  Government agencies leak information like a sieve.  And they reason they do it is SHEER, UTTER INCOMPETENCE.

Of course, the Calvert Street Communist Party Newsletter chalks it up to data not being "encrypted" on a notebook.

But the problem is much, much worse.  And the government is not the only stupid organization that takes improper measures with your data and mine.

Tonight, I received this information email from Wade Kach, R-5B (full disclosure: he was also my 7th grade math teacher at Loch Raven Middle School):

For nearly a decade, lawmakers in Annapolis have tried in vain to pass legislation banning motorists from using cell phones while driving. Far ranging in scope, the current proposal bans use of hand-held devices, including text-messaging.

This year’s version of the proposal (SB 2) passed the State Senate by a 26 to 21 vote.  The bill is now before the House Environmental Matters Committee.    

HB 2 prohibits the driver of a school vehicle that is carrying passengers and is in motion from using a wireless communication device. This prohibition also applies to the holder of a learner’s instructional permit or provisional driver’s license who is age 18 or older.

In addition, the bill prohibits any other driver of a motor vehicle that is in motion from using the driver’s hands to use a wireless communication device other than to initiate or terminate a wireless telephone call or to turn the wireless communication device on or off.

This prohibition does not apply to the use of a wireless communication device to call a 9-1-1 system for purposes related to a contemporaneous emergency.

A police officer may enforce the bill’s provisions only as a secondary action when detaining a driver for another suspected violation. For a first offense, the violator is subject to a fine of up to $50. For a first offense, points may not be assessed against the driver unless the offense contributes to an accident. The court is authorized to waive the fine for a first-time conviction if the person proves that he or she has a hands-free accessory, attachment, add-on, or built-in feature for the wireless communication device.  For a second or subsequent offense, the maximum fine is $100.

The AAA Foundation lists talking on a cell phone as one of several driving distractions, including fellow passengers and adjusting a radio or other listening device.  The Foundation notes that drivers talking on a hands-free phone still tend to be distracted by the conversation, while the act of dialing and receiving calls requires drivers to remove at least one hand from the wheel of the car.
 
According to the Network of Employers for Traffic Safety, driver distraction accounts for 30% of all accidents.  Studies conducted in 2006 by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and the Virginia Tech Transportation Institute concluded that the most common distraction for drivers is cell phone use.  Likewise, a 2005 study published in the British Medical Journal found that drivers on cell phones are four times more likely to be involved in a crash.
 
State law already prohibits teen drivers from using cell phones.  The state’s negligent driving law prohibits many other activities that constitute driver distraction. Bans on drivers using hand-held phones have been enacted in California, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Oregon, Washington and the District of Columbia.

I welcome your views on this or any other issue of concern to you.

My irreverant reply follows:

Who would have thought that I would ever find common ground with the NAACP?

There is an outstanding editorial in today's Salisbury Daily Times by state and local NAACP leaders who are leading the charge against warrantless DNA searches, an item of great interest before ever-more facistic General Assembly.  While I don't agree with all the reasoning in the editorial, we have a common goal:  to derail the police-state facist tendencies of our state government to make every Marylander the police become involved with a "suspect" in any crime.

Crossposted at Red Maryland

On Red Maryland, my fellow contributor Brian Griffiths points out an article on Hometown Annapolis that Kevin Clarke's attorneys plan to depose O'Guvnah as Clarke's lawsuit against the City of Baltimore moves forward.

Depositions are very interesting, because in most cases -- as Brian points out -- nothing is out of bounds.

Which leads to the possibility that we may finally be able to prove what intelligent people have known all along:  the Ehrlich campaign in general, and Joe Steffen in particular, were not responsible for starting the rumors about O'Guvnah being a tomcat.  In fact, the rumors started in O'Guvnah's own pool of sycophant supporters.

This is only the beginning.

i think its fairly obvious by now that if you took every politician in American, put them all in a gymnasium, and put all the politicians who NEVER broke their marriage vows, or screwed around with young boys, or paid for prostitutes, or whatever on one side of the room, and everyone else on the other side of the room-- it would pretty lonely on that first side of the room.

Which just goes to prove several things:

1)  Prostitution is the oldest job in the word:  you either whore yourself out to voters and contributors, or you are buying the whores.

2)  Politicians, like professional athletes and other celebrities, rarely if ever should be considered "role models".

3)  The old phrase "politics makes strange bedfellows" has many meanings.

I am not a chemist, nor a chemical engineer.  I did okay, but not great, in high school chemistry-- despite the best efforts of Mr. Fred Dinges to help me do better.

But, I do know this:  Diesel Fuel is really nothing more than Number 2 Heating Oil, with some additive to handle cold weather better and to distinguish it from Number 2 Heating Oil (for tax purposes, of course!).  And both of these fuels are not nearly as well refined as standard gasoline (either Regular, Mid-Grade, or Premium).

So why is it that the wholesale price for Diesel or Number 2 is SOOO much higher than regular gasoline?  The cost of off road diesel (used for farm equipment, mainly) was recently quote at $3.46/gallon for a 500 gallon purchase AND based on a 10 year record with the local fuel company.  Note:  off-road diesel has no taxes included.

If you have a good answer for this, please write to me at blog@gunpowderchronicle.com and give me the details.  I will respect any and all requests for anonymity.

Both Gregory Kane and Mark Newgent have some profound articles about Kevin Clarke's recent court victory here in Maryland of O'Guvnah's illegal firing of him as Baltimore City Police Commissioner.

But neither highlights or even covers one of the biggest rumors in this case, the real reason Kevin Clarke might have been fired.

One of the charges we constantly hear from the far left fruitcake hippies like Code Pink, ANSWER, et al, is that the Iraqi War is an illegal one, because there was no congressional declaration of war.

Does this make the Civil War illegal too?  How about the Barbary Wars of the early 1800s? 

Before I launch into my view on this, everyone please get it out of your system.  Go head, and say it:

The Gunpowder Chronicle is a racist.  He drives around Parkton in a 69 Roadrunner with a Conferedate Flag painted on the roof.  He was seen picking up a white bedsheet and hood from the cleaners in Shrewsbury. He drinks to Lee Harvey on MLK's birthday.  His favorite scene in Roots is when Kunta Kinte gets his foot chopped off.  His second favorite scene is when Kizzie gets raped by Master Tom.  Go head, say it.

Okay, now that you have gotten that out of your system, let's get on with some serious thinking.

It turns out that the State Department has fired two and suspended one of their contractors because they went snooping through Barack Obama's passport records.

The Campaign Spot over at National Review Online has an interesting theory on this -- that the information was passed along to the Hillary Clinton Campaign.  This theory is HIGHLY PLAUSIBLE, because it was Hillary Clinton that was up to her fat derriere in the purloining of confidential FBI files on the Clinton political enemies during the 8 YEARS OF HELL.

How stupid do you have to be to work in government and go snooping through files you have no business in?  I mean, haven't you all ever heard of rendition?  Did you think this would go uncovered?  Did you think someone wouldn't find out?  Ever hear of a keylogger? Is the State Department using McDonald's rejects as its main employment pool?

Idiocy in Government Part I came about today when I trotted out to the old mailbox and, tucked inside my copy of the largely worthless North County News was my notification from the Internal Retard Service about the upcoming "economic stimulus" rebate that was on its way.

There's only one problem:  I know for a fact I won't be getting a check, because I am paying off a previous year tax debt.  No check for me.

I wonder how many such notices were sent out nationwide.  Who knows.  What I do know:  the IRS is one of the dumbest, most worthless organizations in the ENTIRE United States Government.

So here is a hearty "dumbass" to every single Congressman and Senator -- plus good old W -- for a completely stupid and incompetent program that not only won't do squat to "stimulate" the economy, but it will cost money to tell people about a check they will never get.

Congratulations to Emily Randall of Hereford Middle School, who won the third annual Baltimore Bee competition at Towson University and will compete in the national 2008 Scripps National Spelling Bee in May!

Read more here.

Once again, the Hereford Zone rules the roost.  Our new bumper sticker:

"My Kid Can Spell Perspicacious. Yours works at McDonalds."